Sunday, October 18, 2009

a dare...

I'm going to dare you to watch a movie.

It's a documentary, "Crazy Sexy Cancer," and it's actually on Discovery Health Channel today. And while I'm trying pretty hard to relate my experience here, Kris Carr manages to emote the Reality so much better with her visuals.

She's not alone nor does she have both oars in the water all the time (imho) but she's feeling on film the same feelings I have... and do. If you don't cry, um, well that won't happen. If you don't laugh, well, that won't happen either. Trust me, it will be a challenge.

So, buy a copy, rent it, borrow it from the library, or Netflix it... if you dare.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

lemme blog atcha

Hot on the heels of the horrible experience that was the bronchoscopy, remember to make sure they knock you out, I got my wind back and had a pretty good week. It was lonely with Jody away again, but it ended on a high...

I got to go back to the track and drive.

I actually signed up about a month ago after seeing the chemo did not completely stop me in my tracks. I did gamble a little but figured it would be far easier to back out or even just carry a credit for a future date instead of try to get in at the last minute. Turns out, I got my moneys' worth.

Ask me how it went and I'll bore you with details of how I got the tires right into their sweet spot with just one session and couldn't get turn 14 right twice in a row except for the very last session and how neither of my ideas for turn 8 really panned out... ;)

Meanwhile, the results of the bronch came back... and they were negative. ???

This is a little like being told to circle before landing. I'm still sick, as the CEA marker rising tells us, but a doctor looking for disease to biopsy inside my lungs did not find any. True, he did see spots, but they were too small to sample. Thus,I'm stuck with disease too big to Cyberknife, too small to surgically remove, too small to biopsy, yet too much of a nuisance in my blood to get me off chemo. What a pain.

As well the K-RAS test came back negative, but that wasn't such a big deal. All that means is I can take Irinotecan with Erbitux in the future if the Xeloda I am on stops doing what it's doing. But for now, the Xeloda is doing what we want it to do and it's doing it without making me sick. Truth be told, my track day last week was the day after I finished my third round (of eight).

Sooooo... I will still stay on the lookout for trials or experimental procedures that may need sick people to volunteer.

This is what a cancer patient can do... eat up S4's :D