Friday, February 6, 2009

100th post...

I couldn't think of a clever title for this post other than to notice it would be #100 on the list. When this started, I naively thought I'd be in the hospital for a bit getting surgeried (tm), miss a few weeks of work, and then all would be good again. I never thought I'd be making a hundred posts to a blog or enduring this gauntlet. Yeah, I'm a little depressed after all this time but don't go rushing to dial 911. I've said it before that if someone told me all the details of what Life would turn into after this, I might have seriously considered doing nothing.

But I did something and I'm pretty much committed to seeing it through now. It'd be one helluva waste to have suffered this much and then cash in my chips early. but that doesn't mean I can't try to do something to make the rest of the ride easier.

Which is why I've been on the edge of my seat with the Cyberknife peeps. As I posted before, it might be an applicable therapy for the metastases I still want rid of. If I'm lucky, I'm a good candidate and maybe won't even need more chemo. I might be an okay candidate and get to mix the two. But I'm realistic and know I'll be back on the chemo if Cyberknife just isn't for me.

I've been unsuccessful in squelching my hopes for consideration though. Even over email I'm vibing a little too much; so much so that I got a 'calm down, be patient' kind of email back the other day after offering again to share all my CT and PET/CT scan images if they were needed.

I got a phonecall from one of the radiation oncologists who was looking over the documents and images I was able to submit. He wants to share them with some other doctors and get a larger consensus opinion and asked if I'd be okay with that. Of course. I concisely listed the doctors I've seen over the whole saga and emailed them to him today and will wait, patiently, while the chew on my case a little while longer. I did explain that Dr. Lee had given me this month to check out Cyberknife and that we're in no hurry. I closed with an acknowledgment that I'm not looking for any shortcuts but am also interested in less discomfort if an alternative treatment might mean dead lesions without a dreadfully ill Sco.

So, please pray for patience for me. :]

2 comments:

Lynn said...

waiting is the worst!! Hoping to hear great news soon. Hang in there - you can keep yourself busy while you wait - I'm sure Jody has a list you can tackle around somewhere......

Bonnie said...

No problemo. I'll add patience to the strength I usually send your way.